A brief(ish) vent

[Dankology]

A few of you here might know that for the last couple of years, alongside playing in my own band, I've also been a member of a fairly well known group that has been around in very various forms since the punk/new wave era.

 

I've done two short British tours with the band as well as a couple of stray dates, the most recent being what seemed to be a very successful gig in November. The main man had floated a handful of 2025 dates by us a few months ago and we had dutifully blocked them out only to learn that a much more comprehensive tour had been booked as the ads hit social media. The drummer and I immediately cleared our calendars but the guitarist, a life-long jobbing musician, had just taken on his first ever straight job and simply couldn't commit to every gig.

 

Having been told categorically that it was very much every gig or no gigs, he recommended an acquaintance to replace him. Our group WhatsApp got a bit quiet after this and we heard via mutual friends a couple of weeks later that the bandleader had met with this new chap and he was cheerily telling people around town that he had been asked to get an entirely new band together.

 

We sat on this knowledge for a couple of weeks and I found that my usual back and forth of messages with (let's call him "Pete"...) simply stopped, even the non-musical rubbish that we often shot around. And then came a group message asking if we could squeeze in a rehearsal for a couple of stray January gigs and an odd "can I get a copy of the backing tracks - there's some things I need to check". At which point I mentioned that I'd heard someone was telling people in Manchester that he'd been asked to put a new band together...

 

This had the predictable effect and both the guitarist and drummer vented the frustrations we'd kept bottled up for the preceding weeks. It was all turned back on us: we'd indulged rumours, got the wrong end of the stick and maybe it was time for a new start. "I'll see if the new guys can do the gigs"... two minutes later "they can!" - must be the shortest amount of time it has ever taken four musicians to read a message, let alone confirm 18 dates.

 

And that was more or less it until on Christmas Eve a Facebook post appeared announcing an emailed "review of the year" type missive including "how I was sacked by my own band due to one member's stupidity". Said missive was inaccurate and quite insulting to the guitarist in particular and so I formulated a response and posted beneath the FB post. The slew of (public) messages that followed was both infuriating and vindicating and I don't think anyone could be in any doubt as to where the blame and the truth variously lay. Interestingly, the line is now that we staged a mutiny as we hadn't appreciated that our current 4-piece band was to be plumped into a 3-guitar, bass, keys and twin-drummer line-up - he should probably feel grateful that the economics (and stage plan) for that were never put to the test.

 

It's ever so sad though. We were a great band and we went far and above what could ever be expected of musicians in terms of practically and psychologically keeping that band afloat. One day I'll tell of all the ridiculous tantrums, indignities, endless sacked van drivers and surreally farcical events that we went through. And the gazebo. It's going to be a great little book.

 

I had a lovely coda of schadenfreude over the weekend: we received a message featuring a screenshot of a mayday message sent as the band's van had broken down part way to a gig on the south coast, driven by the previous tour's second driver, who had originally been sacked in part due to his constant efforts to join the band onstage. That did feel pretty good - well, that plus I'm so much better looking than the new bass player...

 

Onwards and upwards 🙂

Edited January 6 by Dankology

[AndyTravis]

Do you know what mate.

 

You’re a f***ing wonderful bloke; I honestly cannot sing your praises enough.

 

I love your main band so much “Could’ve been love” is honestly one of my favourite songs.

 

So I’ll say this - f*** Johnny clown shoes, and he can stick his mighty wah where the sun don’t shine.

 

Love you pal - chin up (we need to book some 2025 shows together x)

 

 

[Dankology]

Aw, you're a good man 😀

 

As it happens, you're on my list of people to contact this week re 2025 gigs - cannot wait to see your lot again 😍😍😍

[AndyTravis]

14 minutes ago, Dankology said:

Aw, you're a good man 😀

 

As it happens, you're on my list of people to contact this week re 2025 gigs - cannot wait to see your lot again 😍😍😍

We have 5/6 new tunes to road test…all

mine and some with me on baritone/6string acoustic 🫣

[police squad]

sounds like 'Pete' is a complete tool. It's such a shame when people behave like this

[Burns-bass]

I’ve known several musicians to work with “heritage” acts and they can often be a nightmare to work with. Sorry that’s the case here as the tour looks like it would have been a lot of fun.

[Dankology]

37 minutes ago, Burns-bass said:

I’ve known several musicians to work with “heritage” acts and they can often be a nightmare to work with. Sorry that’s the case here as the tour looks like it would have been a lot of fun.

 

I have to say that, on balance, my general feeling is one of relief - as great as the gigs looked, the stresses of actually getting to them, getting set up and getting out again would have really taken the shine off them. Swings and roundabouts...

[TimR]

51 minutes ago, Dankology said:

 

I have to say that, on balance, my general feeling is one of relief - as great as the gigs looked, the stresses of actually getting to them, getting set up and getting out again would have really taken the shine off them. Swings and roundabouts...

 

On the plus side you have a ready made band, just need a singer. 

 

Any complaints from the old singer  and you say he resigned, unless he can show the evidence that you actually sacked him. 

Edited January 7 by TimR

[ezbass]

I recently had an experience with a, let’s call him Alex. He was a minor name in ‘90s and a longtime friend of the guitarist in my current band. He came to see us, so knew my abilities. Subsequently, he asked me if I would add some bass to his latest recording project, which I did for free (the fact he asked me right after the session if I might be interested in joining the band sent some ‘you’re not getting paid for this’ vibes). I left it alone, but he asked again and said there was a ‘launch’ gig, so I put in the hard yards to learn the songs from his back catalogue for the gig and was good to go. Then, all of a sudden, there’s a booked, nationwide tour (small events, pubs, shops, etc). I said that I wouldn’t be able to do some of the gigs and ask subtly about the logistics (to be clear, I don’t believe there were any). He cops a strop and says he needs someone who can commit to all the gigs, fine I said, I understand (it was only my time wasted and some fuel to get to the studio and back) good luck and all that. Next thing I hear, from my guitarist (who is also involved in the project and has the same issue with the sudden ‘tour’), he’s gone a rant on Facebook about people being unprofessional. The guitarist calls him out on this and subsequently quits. Then Alex, stiffs the recording studio for their fee, saying it’s down to the guitarist. Fortunately, we know the studio owner and have a good relationship with him and he doesn’t seek the fee from the guitarist, knowing it’s our fault and has kept the masters. Whether the ‘tour’ ever took place is a mystery, certainly the first ‘album release’ gig was cancelled. Everyone I talk to about it, who know Alex, says that I dodged a bullet and I’ve subsequently heard some tales from his antics in ‘90/‘00s that support this. Some folk need to have a hard word with themselves.

 

I apologise if this rambled a bit and detracts from the OP, but it has been a useful bit of catharsis for me.

[Dankology]

9 minutes ago, ezbass said:

I recently had an experience with a, let’s call him Alex...

This sounds uncannily similar. 

 

I have a certain amount of sympathy with people who have to be narcissistic enough to front a band and who were probably blindsided by initial success and its trappings, never fully maturing into a properly functional human being. In fact, the one question I was asked at every single gig (either by punters, venue staff of other members of the band) was "how/why do you put up with him?" - and my answer always was "because the music is better than the man" - and I truly felt a responsibility to the body of work that outweighed the various torments. Until it didn't!

[ezbass]

1 minute ago, Dankology said:

This sounds uncannily similar. 

 

I have a certain amount of sympathy with people who have to be narcissistic enough to front a band and who were probably blindsided by initial success and its trappings, never fully maturing into a properly functional human being. In fact, the one question I was asked at every single gig (either by punters, venue staff of other members of the band) was "how/why do you put up with him?" - and my answer always was "because the music is better than the man" - and I truly felt a responsibility to the body of work that outweighed the various torments. Until it didn't!

TBH, I felt flattered to be asked to play by someone who had enjoyed some celebrity (albeit very minor compared to his contemporaries) and got caught up in it a bit. Fortunately, the older, possibly more cynical, me doesn’t wear rose tinted spectacles for long and won’t put up with things that I would have even 10 years ago.

[Beedster]

21 minutes ago, ezbass said:

I recently had an experience with a, let’s call him Alex. He was a minor name in ‘90s and a longtime friend of the guitarist in my current band. He came to see us, so knew my abilities. Subsequently, he asked me if I would add some bass to his latest recording project, which I did for free (the fact he asked me right after the session if I might be interested in joining the band sent some ‘you’re not getting paid for this’ vibes). I left it alone, but he asked again and said there was a ‘launch’ gig, so I put in the hard yards to learn the songs from his back catalogue for the gig and was good to go. Then, all of a sudden, there’s a booked, nationwide tour (small events, pubs, shops, etc). I said that I wouldn’t be able to do some of the gigs and ask subtly about the logistics (to be clear, I don’t believe there were any). He cops a strop and says he needs someone who can commit to all the gigs, fine I said, I understand (it was only my time wasted and some fuel to get to the studio and back) good luck and all that. Next thing I hear, from my guitarist (who is also involved in the project and has the same issue with the sudden ‘tour’), he’s gone a rant on Facebook about people being unprofessional. The guitarist calls him out on this and subsequently quits. Then Alex, stiffs the recording studio for their fee, saying it’s down to the guitarist. Fortunately, we know the studio owner and have a good relationship with him and he doesn’t seek the fee from the guitarist, knowing it’s our fault and has kept the masters. Whether the ‘tour’ ever took place is a mystery, certainly the first ‘album release’ gig was cancelled. Everyone I talk to about it, who know Alex, says that I dodged a bullet and I’ve subsequently heard some tales from his antics in ‘90/‘00s that support this. Some folk need to have a hard word with themselves.

 

I apologise if this rambled a bit and detracts from the OP, but it has been a useful bit of catharsis for me.

 

There's a lot of shitiness in there @ezbass but while he was a cock to you the most shitty is not paying the studio fee. That is 100% unacceptable and I hope he gets taken to court, no matter how small the fee

[Beedster]

8 minutes ago, Dankology said:

This sounds uncannily similar. 

 

I have a certain amount of sympathy with people who have to be narcissistic enough to front a band and who were probably blindsided by initial success and its trappings, never fully maturing into a properly functional human being. In fact, the one question I was asked at every single gig (either by punters, venue staff of other members of the band) was "how/why do you put up with him?" - and my answer always was "because the music is better than the man" - and I truly felt a responsibility to the body of work that outweighed the various torments. Until it didn't!

 

We've all been there, even in the most amateur of bands frontmen/women (although more so men in my experience), can be utter prats. I work in sport occasionally and there's a sense among practitioners that many athletes are at their best when their mental health - or at least their ability to rein in extremely narcissistic and egotistical traits - and therefore their ability to function in 'normal' social settings, are at their lowest.

 

I often chuckle and say "You think this lot are bad, you should spend some time in the. music business....."   

[ezbass]

6 minutes ago, Beedster said:

the most shitty is not paying the studio fee.

I totally agree. Suggesting that he try and retrieve the cost from someone else makes it even worse for me. Not only is it sneaky and duplicitous, the arrogance is gobsmacking.

[Beedster]

7 minutes ago, ezbass said:

I totally agree. Suggesting that he try and retrieve the cost from someone else makes it even worse for me. Not only is it sneaky and duplicitous, the arrogance is gobsmacking.

Yep, although IME most studio owners wouldn't be so daft as to accept that as an excuse for not paying (although having said that, I guess bands can be pretty loose about these things when making arrangements).