phil_the_bassist Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 OK, I'm probably just really pissed at having to move outta my f***ing awesome house back to my 'rents after my girlfriend has moved out to London to do her dream job, and I'm stuck in this armpit of a town, about to loose my car, most of my equipment, and my sanity, BUT: I'm sick of what I'm stuck playing. I want to be playing gigs I enjoy, with top musicians, for money...not playing with psychos, weirdos, guitards, egos, attitudes and arseholes! My main gig (sort of a Jam tribute band) is great 'n all, but it's been blighted by lies, fantasy-prone personalities, grudges, arguments, non-communication, break-ups, lineup changes, gig-cancellations, travel times, sickness, poor musicianship and directional changes. My occasional gig (drunken pub rock covers) is sh*tty, with crap pay, crap musicianship, arrogance, egos, guitards, and no real ambition, but 60% of the band are good blokes. My music reading, theory and technique have all fallen by the wayside and gone to pot due to spending the last 4 months learning 30odd Jam songs and teaching myself to sing, and I can't remember the last time I learned something for the sheer joy of playing. I can't leave either band just yet (I need to earn back [i]something[/i] towards what I've invested into these genital-warts of gigs) but I feel like killing something every time I have to get to a rehearsal, or band meeting, or speak to the manager etc. How The Hell can I get outta this rut, and start playing for the love of it again? The only saving grace was the drummer from my main gig...a metalhead double-kick tubthumper who could keep time better than a metronome and had the most awe-inspiring ability to play completely different rhythms with each limb and make it look easy and [i]groooooove[/i]! unfortunately, we haven't heard from him for 5 weeks...so we're guessing he's left. anyhow, sorry about the rant, but I'm f***ing sick of feeling like my gigs are chores. Oh, and if anyone wants to know how to play any of The Jams songs, chances are I know it! hit me up and i'll give you a transcription/vid/cheatsheet for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 (edited) You know the answer - and it's a painful one. It's back on the treadmill for you, my lad. Start schlepping around for a new band. So item #1 [i]before everything else[/i]. Secure yourself some wheels or you ain't goin' nowhere. Edited October 21, 2009 by skankdelvar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Musicman20 Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 Im pretty similar....so im quitting the rather dull job, the band (I love the chaps I play with as they are all old friends, but Ive moved on) and moving to London. I hate coming home from work and thinking 'is this it?' after studying for a degree for 3 years and a post grad for 2. My advice, make plans....move to a bigger more exciting place. I have to..I have no choice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stingray5 Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 In your original post, there's one positive element -- the metalhead drummer in your main band. I'm just wondering if you are able to contact him and see if he might be up for doing something different -- perhaps form a new band with you, or the two of you maybe go out as 'rhythm section for hire'. If he's not been around for 5 weeks, could be he's pee'd off with things too and looking elsewhere. Just a thought. Failing that, I'd say that it sounds like you certainly need a change because your current situation seems like it will just perpetuate negativity and resentment. I really do wish you well and hope you find what you're looking for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ou7shined Posted October 22, 2009 Share Posted October 22, 2009 Major suckage! I'm in pretty much the same boat musically and am staring to face up to the fact that starting something new is the only option. I've already put out some tentative feelers. It's kind of crap that this forum is entirely about the one instrument that you don't need 2 of in a band, therefore although many of us seem to be on the same page we'll never get to play together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisnameistaken Posted October 22, 2009 Share Posted October 22, 2009 Go play for a band that are doing a type of sound you've never done before. Jam tribute band? I grew up on The Jam, love their stuff but FFS I'd be slitting my wrists. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stylon Pilson Posted October 22, 2009 Share Posted October 22, 2009 [quote name='Ou7shined' post='633080' date='Oct 22 2009, 01:13 AM']It's kind of crap that this forum is entirely about the one instrument that you don't need 2 of in a band, therefore although many of us seem to be on the same page we'll never get to play together.[/quote] How many thousands of times have I had this exact same thought. That said, I know a lot of bass players also have some degree of ability on other instruments, so you could potentially set up a band full of bassists where everyone takes turns to play other instruments. S.P. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neepheid Posted October 22, 2009 Share Posted October 22, 2009 Bass ensemble! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
burno70 Posted October 22, 2009 Share Posted October 22, 2009 [quote]In your original post, there's one positive element -- the metalhead drummer in your main band. I'm just wondering if you are able to contact him and see if he might be up for doing something different -- perhaps form a new band with you,[/quote] +1, thats what I'd do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Les Posted October 22, 2009 Share Posted October 22, 2009 [quote name='neepheid' post='633207' date='Oct 22 2009, 09:39 AM']Bass ensemble![/quote] A la Spinal Tap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
urb Posted October 22, 2009 Share Posted October 22, 2009 Moving is often a good option - I've experienced similar phases in the past - the first place I moved after college was to Oxford (after signing on for 18 months in my small hometown!) I got out to lots of jam sessions and as I moved with a musician who had already lived there I got hooked up with quite a few jobbing bands - I was very busy with gigs for a couple of years - and also joined a band in London as the Oxford Tube coach service was a cheap way to schlep back and forth from there - and I have to say I've not looked back since - there are lots of opportunities out there - you just have to go and grab them yourself and not always wait for them to come to you... Go for it Cheers Mike Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Musicman20 Posted October 24, 2009 Share Posted October 24, 2009 [quote name='urb' post='633260' date='Oct 22 2009, 10:58 AM']Moving is often a good option - I've experienced similar phases in the past - the first place I moved after college was to Oxford (after signing on for 18 months in my small hometown!) I got out to lots of jam sessions and as I moved with a musician who had already lived there I got hooked up with quite a few jobbing bands - I was very busy with gigs for a couple of years - and also joined a band in London as the Oxford Tube coach service was a cheap way to schlep back and forth from there - and I have to say I've not looked back since - there are lots of opportunities out there - you just have to go and grab them yourself and not always wait for them to come to you... Go for it Cheers Mike[/quote] +1 Sometimes its time to pack it up and move on. I kinda wish my home band would just fold and give up so I dont leave and regret it in a few years. But, its taken about 5-6 months to write 2 new songs, and thats just not good enough for me. Plus, our crowd of fans have now moved on to pastures new, and they wont be coming back very often. Theyve all got new bands as well in their new towns. Ill miss my drummer, a lot. Hes fantastic....Im hoping later in life I will be in another band with him. But, sometimes a risky move is the RIGHT move. I hope anyway! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trent900 Posted October 24, 2009 Share Posted October 24, 2009 + at least 12 to the idea of asking the drummer if he wants to make a go of something new. Also - completely random and may not suit your situation at all - but I found my playing bass became hugely better, more varied and more fun after I started having drum lessons. It completely opened my eyes to the rhyhtyhhyms inherent in different styles of music. All the best! Jon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickH Posted October 24, 2009 Share Posted October 24, 2009 Touchy question - didn't quite get it from the original post - are you and your GF going to keep it going long-distance, or has she left you to go do this job in London? If the former - up sticks and move down there with her. Completey get out of the scene you're currently in and find a whole new thing. Sure there's plenty of musos in London you could get together with. The idea of staying in the sh*t bands you're currently in to try and recoup your invested cash is bad for two reasons. 1) Don't ever play just for the cash. (Unless you're a full-time pro of course, but the quality of bands you're talking about don't give that impression even if that's what you want to be doing). 2) You'll just end up putting more into it and end up financially worse, unless you splashed a stack on recording a GREAT demo which is now getting you agent & management interest and gigs are starting to flood your way. Then you'd recoup. Even if your GF is now definitely ex (if so, sorry to hear about it) a completely fresh start in a new town could be a great thing. Life is short. Carpe diem! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Musicman20 Posted October 24, 2009 Share Posted October 24, 2009 [quote name='NickH' post='635472' date='Oct 24 2009, 06:15 PM']Touchy question - didn't quite get it from the original post - are you and your GF going to keep it going long-distance, or has she left you to go do this job in London? If the former - up sticks and move down there with her. Completey get out of the scene you're currently in and find a whole new thing. Sure there's plenty of musos in London you could get together with. The idea of staying in the sh*t bands you're currently in to try and recoup your invested cash is bad for two reasons. 1) Don't ever play just for the cash. (Unless you're a full-time pro of course, but the quality of bands you're talking about don't give that impression even if that's what you want to be doing). 2) You'll just end up putting more into it and end up financially worse, unless you splashed a stack on recording a GREAT demo which is now getting you agent & management interest and gigs are starting to flood your way. Then you'd recoup. Even if your GF is now definitely ex (if so, sorry to hear about it) a completely fresh start in a new town could be a great thing. Life is short. Carpe diem![/quote] +1 Good advice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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