john_the_bass Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 I have a dilemma of sorts. I play in 3 bands at present, band 1 - one I really enjoy (covers); band 2 - one that stretches me and my ability, takes me to some interesting places and ocassionally puts money in my pocket; band 3 - one that I'm not really feeling but the gigs have been quite good - we have played at some pretty hard to get into venues and the last two gigs have been opening for touring acts I have been asked to join a 4th band on the bass. I have just been for a jam with them and their songs are sort of melodic indie pop and I quite like it. I also like the fact that they rehearse about 6 minutes from my front door. I can't play in 4 bands as I won't have any time to do anything else like eat or sleep. I know which band I want to drop (3) but I don't really know how to do it. I feel bad for them because I don't know what they will do for a bass player and I know (not to sound big headed) but that my leaving them will slow their ambitions slightly, mainly because they will have to spend time on teaching their songs to another bassist. I don't know how to let them down gently, but I'm not really into the songs and I am finding it more difficult to motivate myself to make a 60 mile round trip for rehearsals when I'm not really into it. And....I've also been asked to join another band - I've never had so many offers!! In an ideal world I'd sack the lot off and concentrate 100% on the covers band, but I do enjoy playing the other stuff I suppose. Any ideas? Sorry for the confusing set of words that is this post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldGit Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 Just tell them and give them notice, say a month, and offer to help them get a new person up to speed. If you have gigs booked you should honor them but then just move on. They will find their way without you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 (edited) Just tell them.. You can only do what you can only do....and something has to give. I assume this is just pin money and there isn't a wage out of it...?? Tell them it is not working what with the travelling etc and say you will give them x times notice. If it makes you feel better, give them as much time as you can upto 3 months... or a few rehearsals where you can walk the bass player through a few things. Or just do the gigs which pay and are in the book upto a certain point... Tell them you want to leave but so they can see you are trying to be reasonable and willing to help them through it..upto a point. A reall hard-arsed way would be to ring them up and say, that is it... but you have no reason to do it that way, atm..IMV. Edited November 2, 2009 by JTUK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BIG.J Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 I have just had to make that very same decission! Just before logging onto Basschat i made the decission to contact one of my bands and inform them i will be leaving, I had also been concidering things for a while but its best to nip things in the bud now! I have decided to stick with 1 x covers band & 1 x Tribute. There comes a point when you take on so much that you loose the enjoyment! I have also been asked last week if i would concider playing bass for some studio work with a solo artist, I now feel happy with my commitments. Go with what feels right, Things can only get better. It was a little easier for me as i was the one who managed the bookings so i just cancled the future gigs! Good luck Justin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisnameistaken Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 I don't know how you find time for three. I suppose it's nice to be wanted though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_D Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 I have thought once or twice about seeing another band or two to see what else is out there. I always put it off because its a struggle fitting gigs in with normal life... How do you guys, married or otherwise, manage to juggle different bands? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutToPlayJazz Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 [quote]How do you guys, married or otherwise, manage to juggle different bands?[/quote] I suppose as a pro, I have to take whatever pays the most. I'm in the lucky position where Mrs.OTPJ also works very odd hours, so the work always comes first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheRev Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 (edited) [quote name='The_D' post='644079' date='Nov 3 2009, 04:34 AM']I have thought once or twice about seeing another band or two to see what else is out there. I always put it off because its a struggle fitting gigs in with normal life... How do you guys, married or otherwise, manage to juggle different bands?[/quote] I'm in 3 bands but only one of them rehearses on a regular weekly basis which helps to fit everything into the week. Also, as I've got older the people I play with tend to have families and responsible jobs so they're not looking to rehearse or gig every week. Generally, we get together a few days before a gig to run through material, or, if we have to use a dep drummer or guitarist we might do two pre gig rehearsals but that's about it. Forward planning and a diary is the key really. Occasionally you take your eye off the ball and things get a bit crowded - I recently found myself doing 2 rehearsals and 3 gigs in one week which was bloody hard work trying to fit everything in around a full time job, a martial arts class and an increasingly huffy Mrs Rev. I'm only in multiple bands because I like gigging and I can't seem to say 'no' when someone asks me to join their band or do a dep gig. If I was in a band that gigged 3 or 4 times a month then that would probably be my only band. I do like the variety of being in multiple bands though, it keeps things fresh. Dave Edited November 3, 2009 by TheRev Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldGit Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Me and Mrs OldGit have a set of parameters we have agreed, many years ago. Me and my main band have another set of rules re frequency of gigging and rehearsing due to work and family commitments and other band involvments.. For example we don't take bookings in August. That's the band's "Marraige Maintenance Month" when do family holidays and stay in on Saturday nights to try to redress some of the damage playing in a band does to family relationships. The guys in the band that play in multiple other bands work the first in the diary system, unless something extraordinary comes up. Then we may get a dep. Both sets of rules get bent for interesting gigs such as big money/big stage/family friendly or just different. All other gigs are deps booked on a one-off basis and although I play regularly with one band I'm not a member as such. When, BC*, I used to play in three bands it was first in the diary and "who can play without me?" situation. I had a bunch of deps who I could call on if I was already booked ana second band gig came in for teh same date. The bands were cool with that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris_b Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 How often do your current bands play? Do they let you put in deps? This business is all too often famine or feast, so my inclination is to do all the gigs you can, in as many of the bands as you can and just manage the clashes. If you really feel you have to leave one of the bands (60 miles vs 6 mins!!) just tell them and commit to playing until they find someone to replace you. Then you haven't left anyone in the lurch. Keep it friendly and you could be playing with them again in the future when you don't have any band! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 (edited) Band (3) will manage without you. Give them a firm date for leaving and offer assistance in finding a replacement - ad on here. Managing the transition is the critical issue. You don't want to stall their ambitions, so give them the help that's been described - work the new bass player in. When they (or you) have located your replacement, meet up with the individual and brief them on the band / set. Talk them through the songs - keys, arrangements, etc. Play them any recordings that have been made and give them any notes you have. As an optional extra, take them along to a band rehearsal and let them watch you run through the set. Talk them through any questions afterwards. Emotional hugs all round, offer to dep in emergencies and hasta la vista. So, where's band (3) and what sort of stuff do they do? Anywhere near Banbury? Eh? Eh? Edited November 3, 2009 by skankdelvar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thunderbird13 Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 [quote name='skankdelvar' post='644216' date='Nov 3 2009, 10:35 AM']So, where's band (3) and what sort of stuff do they do? Anywhere near Banbury? Eh? Eh?[/quote] and just when I thought you had committed to the suicide bummers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rich Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 [quote name='OldGit' post='643996' date='Nov 2 2009, 11:16 PM']Just tell them and give them notice, say a month, and offer to help them get a new person up to speed. If you have gigs booked you should honor them but then just move on. They will find their way without you...[/quote] Aye, what he just said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earbrass Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 [quote name='OldGit' post='643996' date='Nov 2 2009, 11:16 PM']They will find their way without you...[/quote] The graveyard is full of "indispensible" men. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 (edited) [quote name='thunderbird13' post='644219' date='Nov 3 2009, 10:42 AM']and just when I thought you had committed to the suicide bummers [/quote] Still am. I've bought the e-bow and the KY - when's the next rehearsal? [/derail] Edited November 3, 2009 by skankdelvar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 [quote name='The_D' post='644079' date='Nov 3 2009, 04:34 AM']........ How do you guys, married or otherwise, manage to juggle different bands?[/quote] It is all in the diary as far as I am concerned. I have one regular unit that will take precedence over all else, but we are very picky with dates. The rest are deps or fillers where the booker takes the gig and then puts a band together and you just play the pad... The more you do this, the more you meet people and the more calls you can get. Nobody uses people they don't know unless they are really desperate, IME. I now work on the basis of if I fancy it and it sounds good, then it is a possible. I am not interested in playing to 3 men and a dog but you have to be careful what you blow out as the nature of these things are that you get the calls back because it works out very easily with all concerned. If you turn down too many then they find someone else and it gets harder to claim the gigs back... I wouldn't have the time for 3 reheared situations, for sure and I wouldn't want to get burnt-out again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john_the_bass Posted November 4, 2009 Author Share Posted November 4, 2009 Thanks for the tips - I think the best thing to do is to give them some notice and help them find a replacement. The band is in Nottingham and plays sort of Arctic Monkeys style indie. They are doing alright and the locals seem to love them, but I just don't find it particularly challenging - not really enough to travel 60 miles for a band practice. I was kind of thinking I should just make my excuses and go as we are scheduled to record a song on Sunday and I didn't think it fair on them that I was going to record my part and then leave them, but it would be a good opportunity to have a chat with them. I think I'm going to make the jump into the other band much closer to home to keep my bass playing going. I'm happy to rehearse a couple of hours with one band and another couple of hours with another band each week - the third band for me has a nice easy, almost-no commitment work ethic which is good as the sets don't change and the money is alright so I can keep that up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MB1 Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 (edited) MB1. ...You might be better dropping Oasis!......Liams too busy with his fashion line at the moment!. Depends on which one pays the most Tinned Tomatoes?... Edited November 4, 2009 by MB1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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