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am I cursed?? lol


Sarah5string
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Things were going well with the band I joined in january, we'd got a gig lined up for the beginning of june and was really excited but typically, out of the blue this afternoon I got a call from the drummer saying that his heart wasn't in it anymore so he was leaving, he'd called the guitarist (his friend) to talk about it and he agreed so they've called it a day on the band. Bit of a shock as only 3 weeks ago we;d agreed to start gigging and I booked our first gig.

This is now my 3rd band, and each one has died a death before it's gotten up and running properly.

Is it me? Or am I just cursed? Should I sack off doing originals and join a nice covers band instead??

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I had the same problem when I first started to play. I was desperate to be in a gigging band. It took a hell of a lot of auditions and letdowns before I finally got going.

If you're passionate about playing bass, as you obviously are, something will turn up sooner or later.

Don't give up!

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Stupid drummers. :) I'd be annoyed if I'd just booked a gig then they quit. Maybe they just don't fancy gigging though.

You should try and find more people. If there was another band member that's still up for gigging, stay in contact with them and find new people.

If you replace people as they leave, even if you end up with a totally new lineup, at least the band should be a bit more steady.

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I think it happens to a lot of us, including me, you've just gotta take charge. You can't blame yourself for what happened, it just sounds like there was a lack of respect on the drummers part. If I were you I'd start off fresh, have a clear set of goals and find like minded musicians with whom you have mutual respect. If that doesn't work, you can only keep trying!

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I think this is why bands advertise for "no time wasters". Sounds like the drummer didn't really feel like playing live - I had a similar thing with a singer a couple of years back, finally got to the stage of playing one gig and he wants a month off!

I think you have just been a little unlucky. I don't buy into this originals vs covers band debate as there are plenty of uncommitted covers bands out there too. I'd suggest either forming your own band (with people who want to gig) or joining a gigging band who have just lost a bassist.Failing that get yourself down the local Open Mic as it's a great way to meet musicians who want to play live.

Chin up & best of luck

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I would agree with most of what has already been said, and perhaps the best thing would be to see if any of the band are up for starting afresh.......failing that try starting your own band - that way you have more control over your/the bands development.

I'm afraid the situation you are in comes to a lot of musicians at some time or other...and you just need to weather the storm.

I had intended to come along to the Varsity to suppot you, as it's only a few minutes up the road.....maybe next time.

I hope you find some worthy musicians to work with soon....

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[quote name='Sarah5string' post='802891' date='Apr 11 2010, 06:55 PM']Things were going well with the band I joined in january, we'd got a gig lined up for the beginning of june and was really excited but typically, out of the blue this afternoon I got a call from the drummer saying that his heart wasn't in it anymore so he was leaving, he'd called the guitarist (his friend) to talk about it and he agreed so they've called it a day on the band. Bit of a shock as only 3 weeks ago we;d agreed to start gigging and I booked our first gig.

This is now my 3rd band, and each one has died a death before it's gotten up and running properly.

Is it me? Or am I just cursed? Should I sack off doing originals and join a nice covers band instead??[/quote]

Not really. EH hasn't managed to be in a decent band for 3 years which got anywhere near doing a gig.

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Keep plugging away and it will happen. Drummers are a breed apart - my last (death metal) band folded because we had a technically superb drummer who we couldn't replace when he called time to learn to be a teacher ... this was three gigs after we had waited six months for him to recover from serious hand and face injuries sustained when he had decided two guys in Woolworths were on the rob and he wanted to be a vigilante and try out his ju jitsu at the same time :)

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[quote name='Pete Academy' post='802921' date='Apr 11 2010, 07:13 PM']Don't be afraid of doing covers. You'll do it eventually anyway. :)[/quote]

Almost everything you play adds to your learning

I played country which i dont like for a year and I learned from it and even more when I played waltzes and quicksteps

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Don't give up. Plus playing gigs can be just as annoying as being in a band with folk who are idiots. My current band, the drummer is one of my best friends, but is ludicrously unreliable. It's a pity because he's a fantastic drummer.

I've had, (just like I'm sure like most people on this forum have had) awful experiences with let downs. It happens sadly.

I would think that something will come along. It always does.

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[quote name='Sarah5string' post='802911' date='Apr 11 2010, 07:07 PM']Starting to wonder if it's me![/quote]

Yep it's definitely you :)

I kid, I kid - anything involving other musicians seems to often end up being hardwork, keep trying, something will turn up.

Somehow I often found problems with drummers, maybe it comes with the desire to hit things.

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[quote name='Sarah5string' post='803199' date='Apr 11 2010, 11:07 PM']It's come to light that it seems I've not been told the whole story and there's some issue with the guitarist and the drummer... as I've been told that basically the only way they could save their friendship was to knock the band on the head...

Odd..[/quote]

MB1. :)
...Hope theyre very happy together! :rolleyes:
Bit of a Downer!...youve just got a New amp too!

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There should be a pet drummer scheme. Hit up your local drum teacher, pick a promising student and adopt them, jam with them regularly as a supplement to their lessons, and they'll get better much quicker, then you'll have a tame drummer that knows your playing.

And there is no guitarist based problem that can't be fixed with more amps.

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It's men. We're terrified of commitment.

Actually I can understand the guitarist/drummer thing. I was in a band with a good friend, we had quite different musical tastes, which was fine outside the band setting, but in band together we argued and got on one anothers nerves. In the end he left and set up his own band, which was better for both of us, and we're still friends.

Edited by spinynorman
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